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sheva 2007-12-06 23:46

[轉貼] 英文作文亂用複雜句式詞彙:只會弄巧反拙?

中五中七的學生文章令人最頭痛的問題總是這個:亂用的字詞和句式。大部份香港學生的英文作文是怎樣的呢? 用死記的文法把死記的生字串連在一起就成為句子,再於句子與句子間加上硬背來的連接詞,就成為一篇香港高中生的文章了。內容永遠空洞乏味,文句纍贅不通卻言之無物。整篇文章就是充斥著 "on the ground that","in view of the fact that","it is beyond dispute","as we all know"等等的廢話,也不會理會這些詞組是否和文章的文體語氣相配,今次用完 but 下次就用 however,卻從不理會兩個字語氣含意甚至用法都大大不同,總之記幾多用幾多,這句用不了下句用。

最後出來的,就是一篇雜亂無章,文句不通,用字奇奇怪怪的所謂文章。

普遍的高中生都有一個錯誤的想法,以為作文用字越深,句式越複雜就越能 impress 考官。讀高中的年代最流行的是背誦又長又多音節的深字,以為字越長,看上去越高深就越高分,卻從不理會不同字之間意思和語氣上細微的分別:

Very太普通所以永不錄用,要用新學的 Tremendously 或 Immensely 代替。Happy 太平凡了,就用 Jubilant,Gay。有些人連 Feel 字都覺得太 cheap,要說甚麼 experience a 甚麼 sensation 才夠高級,因為用字多了句字結構複雜了,還有最重要的是其他考生不懂得這樣說。最後,考試時作寫給朋友的信,簡單的一句 "I feel very happy." 就變成了 "I experience a tremendously jubilant sensation" 這句沒人看得懂的怪物。

現在時代變了,考試局也提過多次,不要亂用深字,大家開始知道用深字不能取得高分,就開始改變策略,變為死記看來很複雜的句式文法,甚麼倒裝句,隸屬名詞子句,垂懸修飾語等等等等。今堂補習學了個 Dangling Modifier,以後作文就三句裡面兩句都用,整篇文章就變成這樣不倫不類的文字:

The school bell having rung, I went back home. Being at home, I didn''t do my homework. Feeling hungry, I took the chicken out of the fridge. Frozen, it had to be defrosted.

最恐佈的還是那些學了倒裝句之後驚死無人知你識用的同學,作文時隔句使用,本來已經奇怪的句子變得更奇怪。有些更有野心的同學嫌還未夠,還要句句用上死背來的成語,比喻等等。就句句寫成 "hungry like a dog","frozen like a rock"等等的廢話,還以為自己好型。那麼好好的一段文章就變成這樣的一堆...

The school bell having rung, back home I went. Being at home, lazy like a pig, I didn''t do my homework. Feeling hungry like a dog, out of the fridge I took the chicken. Frozen like a rock, it had to be defrosted.

同學們須知道,英文內有這麼多不同的句式,是有原因的。不同的文法,不同的句式,表達不同的語氣和含意,並不是任你亂用的。

英文底子不夠,加上新字新句用法含意學等不夠深入就在文章內亂用,這就是走火入魔了。

寫文章要寫得好,一定要用自己應付得來的字句。要夾硬逼出來的,一定用得不好。有人可能會問,如果我真正懂得用的文字句子不多,如果只用它們文章不就變得平淡乏味嗎? 無計。寫得一篇正常自然的文章,總比上面那些不倫不類的字堆好。大家要做的是平時學新野時一定要更用心去學。學新字,作的不只是字面的意義,或對應的中文解釋,而要學好它的用法和背後的含意,也要理解它和其他意思近似的字用法有甚麼不同。學新句也一樣,不要只是公式般死記文法,而要學甚麼時候適用甚麼句式等等。


siman 2007-12-06 23:54
I experience a tremendously jubilant sensation
咁似D翻譯機既

The school bell having rung, back home I went. Being at home, lazy like a pig, I didn''t do my homework. Feeling hungry like a dog, out of the fridge I took the chicken. Frozen like a rock, it had to be defrosted.
好似講緊冷笑話咁

sheva 2007-12-07 00:00
期待英文高手發表讀後感

垃圾桶 2007-12-07 00:11
羅高分

一個字: 淺

不賣弄花巧,愈賣愈揭多d錯處出來..

希汀加 2007-12-07 00:14
引用第3樓垃圾桶2007-12-07 00:11發表的“”:
羅高分
一個字: 淺
不賣弄花巧,愈賣愈揭多d錯處出來..

絕對同意...
雖然我考試都係亂黎

黑魔道士比比 2007-12-07 00:28
我諗我會部份認同上面篇文, 但係我想話只有英文真係好好既人先可以用淺字表達出好好既英文~
混入少許較為不常用既字, 重點唔係要話比考官聽你好勁, 而係比考官覺得呢份卷同其他既有點不同~
所以我覺得~ 英文不太好而又希望突圍而出的, 都係要用d 深字~

以上之係舉出左「物舉必反」既例子, 你唔好去咁盡咪得囉~~

聰明豆 2007-12-07 14:50
hungry like a dog
frozen like a rock


睇黎d學生仲以為押韻有分加

朗仔 2007-12-07 15:38
I experience a tremendously jubilant sensation" 這句沒人看得懂的怪物。
笑到噴野

keicarlos 2008-03-02 17:48
今次用完 but 下次就用 however

我成日都係咁GA WOR

朗仔 2008-03-02 17:52
引用第6樓聰明豆2007-12-07 14:50發表的“”:
hungry like a dog
frozen like a rock
[表情]
睇黎d學生仲以為押韻有分加 [表情]


don"t me silly give me money

tsang0701 2008-03-02 18:34
引用第8樓keicarlos2008-03-02 17:48發表的“”:
今次用完 but 下次就用 however
我成日都係咁GA WOR [表情]

好正路

黑魔道士比比 2008-03-02 22:33
引用第8樓keicarlos2008-03-02 17:48發表的“”:
今次用完 but 下次就用 however
我成日都係咁GA WOR [表情]

可以善用埋 Yet 同埋 Nevertheless~ 呢2個少好多人用, 但係用法一樣 同埋 幾自然~

tl9189 2008-03-02 23:33
我作文絕大部份都只用類似「s+v+o」既句式 間中用下connective就算...
英文差,所以都唔敢亂用修辭or複雜句式~
寧願簡單d,做到一個grammar mistake都無∼都好過用d唔識用既野~

據我記得,英文既比喻~唔似得中文有本體、喻詞、喻體就得,仲要有d規則=.=(好煩∼)

tsang0701 2008-03-03 08:39
引用第11樓黑魔道士比比2008-03-02 22:33發表的“”:
可以善用埋 Yet 同埋 Nevertheless~ 呢2個少好多人用, 但係用法一樣 同埋 幾自然~

Nevertheless真係未見過

ranKINGdom 2008-03-03 17:11
一直都支持用simple english
我英文好屎,太複雜ge句子結構唔識,vocab又識唔多
但係我次次英文作文都好高分下
我諗係因為少mistakes、內容充實同埋流暢

仲有,我覺得作議論文最好,非常公式化,絕少離題

tsang0701 2008-03-03 17:14
引用第14樓king6a2008-03-03 17:11發表的“”:
一直都支持用simple english[表情]
我英文好屎,太複雜ge句子結構唔識,vocab又識唔多
但係我次次英文作文都好高分下
我諗係因為少mistakes、內容充實同埋流暢 [表情]
.......



呢個問題好嚴重

銘〝 2008-03-03 19:27
真係好文章一篇,,支持,,睇完好有感覺..

rBB 2008-03-03 19:37
引用第11樓黑魔道士比比2008-03-02 22:33發表的“”:
可以善用埋 Yet 同埋 Nevertheless~ 呢2個少好多人用, 但係用法一樣 同埋 幾自然~

i love eating yet/nevertheless he love drinking



咁用?

智者 2008-03-03 19:46
引用第17樓kobeBB2008-03-03 19:37發表的“”:
i love eating yet/nevertheless he love drinking
.......



loves


再者句野好似無轉折關係喎..........

P仔 2008-03-16 13:21
引用第6樓聰明豆2007-12-07 14:50發表的“”:
hungry like a dog
frozen like a rock
[表情]
睇黎d學生仲以為押韻有分加 [表情]

笑左

OldSosad 2008-03-16 14:29
點都要有 d 深少少既 .. 太淺冇咩特別~

goldenhk 2008-03-16 20:32
for ppl who are using english as their 2nd language
using simple english can express ur ideas easier

銘〝 2008-03-16 21:25
引用第21樓goldenhk2008-03-16 20:32發表的“”:
for ppl who are using english as their 2nd language
using simple english can express ur ideas easier

YES , I AGREE with you
Some of them would like to use some so called "high class" vocabularies
However, that will make sentences become hard to read-口-

yanyan 2008-03-17 19:40
引用第20樓奧脫福2008-03-16 14:29發表的“”:
點都要有 d 深少少既 .. 太淺冇咩特別~ [表情]

呢d就係會考a同c o既分別

goldenhk 2008-03-21 20:54
引用第22樓銘〝2008-03-16 21:25發表的“”:
YES , I AGREE with you
Some of them would like to use some so called "high class" vocabularies
However, that will make sentences become hard to read-口-


however dont use CHINESE grammer in english wirtting ....
i used to make this mistake a lot

銘〝 2008-04-21 16:47
引用第24樓goldenhk2008-03-21 20:54發表的“”:
however dont use CHINESE grammer in english wirtting .... [表情]
i used to make this mistake a lot

THAT MEANS CHINGLISH
In fact i seldom have this kind of problem
however, i make a lost of mistake in my grammar or even spelling...

CKL 2008-04-21 17:46
引用第25樓銘〝2008-04-21 16:47發表的“”:
THAT MEANS CHINGLISH
In fact i seldom have this kind of problem
however, i make a lost of mistake in my grammar or even spelling...

a lost of


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